October 12, 2008 @ 11:33 pm

6/29/2006


“I’ve lived in Hollywood for 4-5 years. It has it’s ups and downs like anyplace else. If you go someplace new with little expectation - you tend to appreciate beauty more easily there. Ironically, I went to Hollywood with little expectation and have now come to Ithaca with more expectation. I would guess you expected more than I did from Hollywood, and perhaps less than I do from Ithaca. Either way, I’d like to hear more about your Hollywood experience and how it compares (in a liberal / progressive sense) to life in Ithaca. ”

Most of the progressive/liberal culture here is a farce. It’s just people who want to be seen as “progressive/liberal” but they don’t actually do anything about it. They just have cool haircuts that cover their eyes and cool vintage clothing. Stick it to the man!!!

It’s pretty much the same anywhere I guess, though. It’s just that Hollywood really puts it all under a microscope, and is merely an exaggerated display of what is occurring throughout the entire nation. And the rift between the haves and the havenots here is ASTOUNDING. People are either living in squalor and feel too powerless to be of any “progessive use”, or they are too rich and famous, and don’t give too much of a shit.

Sure, there’s people in the middle, but the middle is distintegrating at an alarmingly fast pace.

Come to Hollywood if you are the sort who likes to let people know that you are “progressive and liberal” — I recommend living in Silver Lake for that. People here love to “talk the talk”, that’s for sure. But don’t expect your “progressive” attitude to be of any use unless you are also willing to go downtown and see the hordes of homeless crackheads with no hope in the world, and realize that the fact that you call yourself “progressive” doesn’t mean shit to these people.

I don’t mean to blame Hollywood for everything wrong in the world….but….well, yes I do, actually.

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October 12, 2008 @ 11:28 pm

11/4/2006


“Let’s see…” the man on the cell phone says. “We’ve got your beef burritos, your bean and cheese burritos, your breakfast burritos, corndogs, hot dogs, hot dogs with chili, we tuna sandwich, turkey sandwich, egg salad sandwich, we got your Lunchables. How about it?”

I ask the cashier for a pack of Winston Ultra-Lights. The light outside is grey and wet.

“I ain’t goin down that list again you can kiss my black bootie if you think I’m goin down that list again!”

I look at the man and laugh. I like that he’s not looking around the store to see if anyone is listening, if any one is amused. He just doesn’t give a shit. This pleases me.

A couple of teenagers stare at him, then stare blankly at me. For a moment I wonder if they think it’s some “black thing” or something, and they are wondering if they are allowed to laugh too.

I push on the door, step out into the rain.

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October 9, 2008 @ 12:59 pm

Help.


Today I woke up with this mantra in my head:

A VOTE FOR NADER IS A VOTE FOR OBAMA!!! A VOTE FOR NADER IS A VOTE FOR MCCAIN!!!!   A VOTE FOR NADER IS A VOTE FOR OBAMA!!! A VOTE FOR NADER IS A VOTE FOR MCCAIN!!!!   A VOTE FOR NADER IS A VOTE FOR OBAMA!!! A VOTE FOR NADER IS A VOTE FOR MCCAIN!!!!   A VOTE FOR NADER IS A VOTE FOR OBAMA!!! A VOTE FOR NADER IS A VOTE FOR MCCAIN!!!!

Some stock markety guy in a tie kept badgering me with this in my dreams.

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October 9, 2008 @ 4:54 am

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June 10, 2008 @ 8:12 pm

Tryptych.


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June 4, 2008 @ 9:48 pm

Miss Mae says:


mae: The Obama family looks like the American Dream.

me: The American Dream is over.

mae: You sound like _________. “The American Dream is over! We need to run everything through the George Michael filter!”

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June 2, 2008 @ 12:27 am

Love letter for the disembodied.


Today, one final lonesome pink bursting orchid left hanging, drooping.

*

Tomorrow, it, too, will be gone.

Tomorrow, also, I can uncross my legs once again,

Tomorrow, if only there was something worth uncrossing my legs for.

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June 1, 2008 @ 11:20 pm

Long list.


[in no particular order]

neglect
timorousness
isolation
existential despair
transcendence
rebellion
occult
escapism
identity exchange
relocation
depression
unrequited love
substance dependency
substance abuse
ambition
indecision
boredom
unwanted love
cowardice
paltering + prevarication
misogyny
sociopathy
betrayal
murder
PTSD
insomnia
drama of the gifted child
dramatic ungifted child
vacuousness
histrionics
affectation
vainglory
fickleness
arrogance
disappointment
silence

self-sufficiency
self-actualization
faith
hope
bravery
love
death.

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May 29, 2008 @ 2:41 pm

Vive la solipsisme!


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May 28, 2008 @ 8:36 pm

Short list.


1. alcohol
2. alcohol
3. no comment
4. cocaine
5. heroin
6. French
7. okay, I guess
8. crack
9. cocaine
10. utter confusion
11. LSD/marijuana
12. heroin
13. amphetamines

Houston….

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